I have been saddened of late by so many clients who are allowing themselves to be put under insupportable stress in order to maintain a lifestyle. To step down from two people earning to just one seems to be an adjustment most new families simply do not have the luxury of contemplating, let alone achieving. Many couples work long hours, leaving their child or children to be brought up in nursery care or by a child minder.
Please don't get me wrong - I am not making a judgement here. I didn't take readily to motherhood myself and was soon on the look out for a part time job to relive the unremitting boredom of being with baby, and later babies. But parents (and either mother or father could be the main carer of the children) seem to spend so little time day to day with their children and sometimes, even when they do, they are totally focused on achievement and development rather than on play and having fun together.
The world seems to be giving us the message that we must have everything new and up to date, that simply enjoying a child's company is not enough. We must be making sure they are stimulated and entertained all their waking hours. My own children spent hours playing imaginary games in the garden, getting dirty, sometimes helping their Dad. We holidayed in England until they were 8 and 10, going to the seaside every year where again they spent days on end trawling through pools, climbing the rocks and making sand castles. Yes, we did visit nearby attractions, but not daily. Later we ventured to France, camping near a lake or by the sea, continuing until they began to plan holidays themselves with friends. Life seemed so simple then.
Yes, we were short of money. I worked for a charity and earned relatively little. But I think we were not only happy but content. They survived divorce and moving to a smaller home without obvious damage. My children look back fondly on their childhood, and both have children of their own now who are being brought up in a very similar way.
I wonder what we could do to change the "have it all" culture that seems to prevail now. We would all be so much happier, content, in fact.