I have recently joined the Athena Network, an inspirational networking organisation for women in business. The meetings are supportive as well as practical - check it out. There is bound to a group near you.

At our lunch this week the talk was inevitably about the alleged recession, how it was affecting us individually and what we could do to protect ourselves from its effects on our own lives.
As you know, I am already working with people who have been affected by redudancy or unplanned early retirement to help them change what may seem a body blow into an opportunity to set off on a new exciting road.

Many people out there who are still in a job will also be being affected by stress. Maybe they are in a role they dislike or find unfulfilling but are scared to seek a change in the uncertain economic climate. Or perhaps they are being put under ever increasing pressure to deliver in the wake of staff cuts. Whatever the situation, more and more people are experiencing increased stress which can be so detrimental to health so I am pleased to offer you my Ten Top Tips for Stress Reduction in your busy life:

1. Write down the things that are worrying you. If you are harbouring resentful or angry feelings, write them down and (safely) burn or shred the paper. This extra step will increase the purging therapeutic effect.

2. Keep things in perspective. Ask yourself, “What’s the worst thing that can happen?” It’s seldom a matter of life and death!

3. Stop what you’re doing and focus on your breathing. Observe the breath entering and leaving your body. Can you feel it brushing your lip? Can you feel you chest rising a falling? Notice other sensations in your body. Bring them into your awareness and observe them. Let tension leave tight muscles as you breathe out.

4. As you being to feel more relaxed, try a visualisation. Maybe you can imagine walking along beside a wide, gently flowing river. Hear the breeze in the trees, the song of the birds, the water rippling by, see the white clouds scudding across the blue summer sky, feel the warm sun on your shoulders. Maybe there is the scent of pines or flowers in the air. As you walk, put your hands into your pockets and pull out one by one the rocks you are carrying which are weighing you down. Throw them far out into the river, watching the ripples spread as the stones disappear one by one without trace. When you have thrown the last rock into the river as far out as you can, walk on feeling lighter and freer than you have felt for a very long time. Once again, enjoy your beautiful, relaxing surroundings until you feel ready to come back and be present in the present.

5. Take some exercise, a brisk walk, punch the punch bag at the gym. Exercise is a great way of getting rid of anger and tension.

6. Take a moment to write down three good things that have happened to you today. Did someone make you smile? Did you have an easy journey to work? It’s so easy to focus on all the negative stuff and block out the positive. Make a conscious effort to bring positive to mind.

7. Remember, What we resist persists. Focus on what you do want, not on all the stuff you don’t want.

8. Learn to say, “No”. Or, if not “no”, then at least, “Yes, but not right now”. Your time is valuable. You are valuable. Don’t overload yourself just to please others. You will be the only one to lose.

9. Get involved in a voluntary activity to help others. You will feel good and develop a sense of belonging and being appreciated which is so important to a flagging self esteem.

10. Plan a treat for yourself – a meal out, a massage, an evening with good friends. Something to look forward to just for you. To coin a very hackneyed phrase, “You deserve it”.

Now that I am reassured that I am fine - although I knew deep down I was, it was good to have it confirmed - I am inspired to give you two thoughts for the weekend:

No. 1 is from Charles Darwin, whose theory is so often misquoted as "the survival of the fittest". In fact he said, ‘It is not the strongest species that survive, nor the most intelligent. It is the one that is most adaptable to change.’

And change is what coaching is all about. Establishing the beliefs and values that are important to you and moving forward to a position where those beliefs and values are reflected in both your working and your personal life.

Quote No. 2 - "It is impossible to get a toehold on success by acting like a heel". Back to those values and beliefs, I think.

Enjoy the weekend!

I am obviously being tested on living with uncertainty. I had planned to write in this blog again after my oncology follow up on 13th January. I had had my blood test and was all geared up to attend when the appointment was cancelled because the consultant was ill with 'flu. I quickly received a new appointment, only to have that one cancelled too because of the unexpected snow fall. My blood test is now more than a month old and my new appointment on 17th February. Ah well, at least I feel well and am busy and fulfilled ....

...and have lots of plans to promote my coaching work - http://www.lifecoach-taliesin.co.uk/ - focusing on clients whose roles have become redundant or who have been forced into unplanned retirement because of the current economic downturn.

In fact I would like to coach anyone facing any kind of change in their life. Change can be such a fantastic opportunity to set out on a new and different path, whatever your age or stage. It can present a chance to use hitherto untried skills, realise dreams or fulfull a long held ambition.

All it takes to turn the negative into a positive experience is a good listener who knows how uncover and develop the very best in you. Take at look at my http://www.lifecoach-taliesin.co.uk/ website and contact me direct for more information and an informal chat.

I was at a most interesting meeting on Monday - Weybridge ecademy's "Last Monday Club". The speaker, Greg Suart, (http://www.ecademy.com/account.php?id=204866) held all our attention with his "outside the box" ideas but one which really stuck in my mind, and which I will be sharing with many of my clients from now on was, when a problem seems insoluble or you have a task to undertake and just have no idea how to begin it, then forget the whys and hows and focus fully on the desired outcome. Take time to get a real sense of how your life will be when the problem is solved or the goal achieved and you will find that the means of achieving success will take care of itself. Of course, this tip will already be know to all those of you out there who have studied NLP, but it is worth remembering .... It's so easy to forget what we know in moments of panic!

Well, I have finally completed my 12 sessions of chemotherapy and had my PICC line removed yesterday. What a relief. I am quite proud of myself for surviving it so well but it was beginning to take a toll psychologically towards the end. Walking into that hospital with all its strange smells, pumps and bags of chemo and knowing that I would come out feeling not better but worse was really hard to deal with - much harder in fact than the physical effects of the treatment. This morning I was able to bath with abandon, no longer having to worry about keeping my right arm above the water - what a blessed relief.

In contrast to the debilitating physical and psychological effects of the treatment, I have nothing but praise for the staff of the chemotherapy ward. They were unfailingly helpful, considerate, efficient and informative. In fact all the treatment I have received under the NHS, which so many people choose to denigrate, has been brilliant. Sometimes in Britian we forget to talk up the good stuff, being all to ready to dwell on the bad.

That's something I regularly tell my clients, particularly those presenting with depression. I set them the task of buying a special diary and faithfully recording at the end of each day at least three good things that have happened to them, even if it was just a smile from a passer by. It is just so easy to dwell on the negative aspects of the day. Likewise, if you make a bad shot or move in your chosen sport, don't fear making another bad one. Immediately turn your attention to the last brilliant shot you made and focus on that. It will unfailingly lift your mood and improve your performance. Try it out. It works.

A couple of weeks ago I sent out one of my regular evaluation forms to clients I have seen in the past 6 - 9 months. I do this to get feed back from clients on a range of things such as suitability of my premises, ease of getting an appointment, successful outcome of therapy provided, whether any unexpected changes or benefits have occurred following the sessions with me. This enables me to make adjustments and improvements to my techniques and to assess what worked well and what did not.

Even though I supply a self addressed, stamped envelope with each letter, the return rate of the evaluation is usually pretty low, around 3%. However, on this occasion in the first few days I was delighted to receive a 10% response, with replies still coming in. Comments have all been positive with a weight loss client remarking: "It was so good to talk in a relaxed atmosphere to another woman and get answers to some questions that had been troubling me." From a young man devastated by the shocking and unexpected death of his father: "Talking through the sudden loss of my father and its impact on the family has been a great help. I was very impressed by Jose and her style." From a nurse who had had some difficulties with her employer, including the threat of redundancy: "Six weeks after completing my counselling I was back in my previous role but in another speciality and am now better placed career wise than before. Thank you."

It is good to receive feedback, more so, of course, if it is positive. It's interesting that sometimes when I feel I have achieved nothing with a client, they report back later that they have been able to make great changes for the better in their lives. I honestly believe that many people talk about their problems - to family, friends and colleagues - but they very seldom feel heard whereas I, as a trained counsellor and hypnotherapist with many years experience now behind me, am able to give them the "unconditional, positive regard" talked about by Carl Rogers and certainly also practiced by the great hypnotherapist, Milton Erickson on whose work my own therapeutic practice is firmly based. I read recently the quotation, by whom I do not know, "To talk is to heal." And this is so true. Clients often say that, having unloaded many of their troubles in the first therapy session where they really feel heard, they then have so much more energy to deal with life. It's as if space is freed up in the brain which can be put to good use.

Of course, I really believe it is important to tailor the therapeutic approach to the individual client and study and experience of many different techniques means I can readily do this, using Emotional Freedom Technique, Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Time Line Therapy, Hypnotherapy and Counselling skills as appropriate, combined with deep relaxation, guided imagery and visualisation to enable clients to bring about changes very safely.

To ensure the safety of all my clients, and maintain my own mental wellbeing, I receive regular one to one supervision from a qualified supervisor with whom I can discuss my clients without identifying them. In addition I convene a Peer Support Group for local hypnotherapists in Guildford, Woking and surrounding areas where again, we may bring client issues, anonymously, of course, and also demonstrate and discuss new or particularly successful techniques we have tried. Members of this group are all hypnotherapists but most also practice in another area as well. For example we have a herbalist, a reflexologist, a healer, and an analytical hypnotherapist. In both areas of supervision, complete client confidentiality is assured.

If you would like more information about my work or about the Supervision/Peer Support Group, which is accredited by the General Hypnotherapy Register, please email me at jose@mindtochange.co.uk.

Last night I went on a very enjoyable "Netwalk" with Ecademy's Breath of Fresh Air Club. The walk was organised by Jenny Littlejohn of www.biglifecoaching.co.uk and Tom Evans of www.psycademy.co.uk. The walk was not a strenuous one, along the banks of the River Wey at Guildford. Participants broke into groups of 4 or 5 and each person had twenty minutes to talk about a business problem they are currently facing. The other members of the group then brainstormed solutions. This open air thinking combined with a healthy walk in the countryside brings forth some brilliant resolution of problems and members always come away re-enthused and invigorated. The evening is complete with a pleasant meal and drink or two at a local pub where further networking and exchange of ideas takes place.

For more information contact either of the above organisers - an evening to be recommended. More strenuous walks are also arranged in the Surrey Hills or in the early morning, finishing with a hearty networking breakfast.

Six treatments behind me now and gearing up for the seventh, I am surprised to find my attitude to the chemotherapy has very much changed for the better. I felt quite different when entering the hospital last time and that seems to be reflected in the way I reacted to the chemotherapy. I had visited my friend, Bridget of Healing House for a further healing treatment, http://www.healing-house.co.uk/. She combines many different techniques and is very intuitive and I have found her help invaluable. Visualisation is such a powerful tool that we can all use to help our bodies heal and recover as well as increase confidence, motivation and generally increase the "feel good factor" in our lives.
With Bridget's help, I have been reflecting on why I might have got the cancer in the first place and changes I can choose to make in my life. A lot stems from my relationship with my mother and, once I had reflected and acknowledged this, I began to see things from a different perspective. The recent visit of a very dear friend from the US has increased my understanding and has also introduced new ideas I can use with my own clients, of which I seem to have a steady stream at the moment.
I have have found a new enthusiasm and motivation for treating clients and am full of new ideas at the moment. The small Peer Support Group for hypnotherapists which meets at my home regularly is also a source of support and inspiration. It is so valuable to share ideas and techniques with others and this group works well as we all have different specialities - healing, herbalism, life coaching, reflexology - but are also all hypnotherapists. At our meeting last week we were discusing the value of being able to incorporate a range of different treatments - Time Line, Emotional Freedom Technique, Eye Movement Desensitisation, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, Hypnotherapy, Neuro Linguistic Programming to name but a few - into our work with clients. If you are interested in finding out more about this group or how to set one up yourself, then please contact me through my website, http://www.mindtochange.co.uk/.

Two more months down the line and 5 chemotherapy treatments behind me, I have nothing but praise for the hospital staff who have treated me. Being consulted and informed all the way along the line has made the treatment much easier to cope with and also meeting many, many other people in the same boat has been very helpful. My life has gone on more or less normally. I can't get to the gym so often as I just don't have the energy right after treatments but I am keeping it up as much as possible and have managed to play tennis twice. The PICC line in my arm doesn't seem to mind my working with weights and wielding a tennis racquet so that's a bonus. We have made more effort to do enjoyable things between treatments and have had two lovely trips to France. Friends and family have been very kind and supportive and I have learned a lot about myself in the process. I understand a lot more about friendship and how we can relate to many different people on many different levels, all helpful stuff when working with clients in the future.
I have just read a brilliant book, Mosters and Magical Sticks by Stephen Heller which has also lead me to be more adverturous in my treatments, particularly in the use of anchors.
Well, enough for now. Study calls.

Once again 3 months have passed since addressing my blog - three months during which I have been on a steep learning curve both about myself and others. After a fantastic trip to New York in early December, we enjoyed a wonderful family Christmas. Sarah came home from Carolina with her two smashing boys and Christmas dinner was cooked to perfection by my younger daughter, Heather and her family. We all had a great time together and family bonds were greatly strengthened.
Our lovely Christmas was followed by a brilliant skiing holiday in La Plagne with Heather, Gary and the two English grandchildren. Everyone skied really well, the accommodation and food were very good, the snow was plentiful and the weather was kind to us.
I was due to have a routine operation to remove a polyp on 23rd January and this is where the learning started!! Apart from having my tonsils out aged 5 and later giving birth to two daughters, I had never been in hospital, and had certainly never undergone an operation. Fortunately I was very fit indeed when I went into hospital and I had prepared myself psychologically by doing lots of positive affirmation and visualisation, accompanied by EFT (tapping) with the support of a friend and colleague from my supervision group. I felt very calm before the surgery and, indeed, it was performed extremely competently. Waking up from the anaesthetic with a very long scar indeed was a terrible shock, however! I think I thought, if I had thought at all, that I would spring lightly from my bed and carry on as normal. Alas, no. The anaesthetic made me feel queasy for days and the stitches were quite painful - it seemed I might fall apart at any moment! Nevertheless, I survived with excellent care from the nursing staff, doctors and consultant at my local hospital, all on the NHS. Brilliant. We so often hear horror stories - I have only praise and admiration for the treatment I received both then and subsequently.
On the sixth day I was released and made my way gingerly home where Roger waited on me hand and foot and many friends came to visit and sent cards. I was quite overcome with everyone's kindness and good wishes. Being an only child, I have found making friends a difficult process all my life. I think I have now learned that friends can come in many guises and different friends will share in different activities in life and relate on different levels. Suddenly I began to feel very privileged and very loved - long may it continue.
I recovered well from the surgery but unfortunately the news from the histology of the polyp was not so good. I was called back quickly to be told that I had in fact had bowel cancer and, although the surgeon was confident everything nasty had been removed, I was advised to undergo a course of chemotherapy. Something in me was not entirely surprised by this news and lots of thoughts are still buzzing around about what I might learn from this experience. Interesting too that the EFT had given me exactly what I had asked for but, much like all the jokes about the fairy and the three wishes, I hadn't asked for exactly the right things. A situation though where it is probably impossible to cover every eventuality.
The idea of being infused with poisonous drugs was anathema to me and my initial reaction was to refuse. However, having thought it over carefully, I decided it would be foolhardy not to have the chemo as an "insurance policy" against cancer returning later just because some miniscule cell had escaped into my system and, once again, my treatment under the NHS was faultless. Everything was explained clearly and support was offered at every stage of the process.
Although I practice self hypnosis, I felt I needed additional support with this and so visited a friend and colleague, Bridget Herbert who is a Reiki Master, hypnotherapist and healer, www.healing-house.co.uk. Bridget works with many different disciplines and her treatment enabled me to clarify my thoughts and to feel calm, comforted and completely healed in many different ways. And I continue to work with the visualisations and positive thoughts she gave me.
I have had my first session of chemotherapy which, whilst not pleasant, was certainly tolerable. It remains to be seen how it progresses, but once again I am practising my tapping daily for a range of positive outcomes. One important thing I have learned is to enjoy today. I have often said to clients, "You cannot change the past and you do not have control over the future. The only real time is now" and, finally, I have begun to practise what I preached and to really enjoy the moment. Having spent a lifetime thinking about what I was going to do next, it has been a hard lesson to learn, but a very worthwhile one.
I continue to see clients and will do, making appointments during the intervening weeks and I feel sure that my experiences will deepen and enhance my work.

When I first qualified as a hypnotherapist, I believed I could cure any ill, no matter how deep-seated - in one session. The more I practise and the more clients I see, the more I realise that clients only reveal their issues little by little. I have just seen a client for a driving phobia. Only on the second session did I discover the embedded limiting beliefs about duty and taking inappropriate responsibility for others that were making every car journey a very anxious experience - would some mistake she made cause injury to others? She wasn't worried about herself, only about any problems her actions may cause. And this was a common feature in all aspects of her life. She took care of everyone, but she never took care of herself. Could I have discovered that in one session? Maybe, or maybe I should have just "done the hypnotherapy" and let her subconscious take care of the rest.

I believe it is really important for a client to leave after the first session feeling that something fundamental has changed for them. But the root of the problem.. that could take a little longer. It is generally recognised that 90% of change in any therapy is brought about by the therapeutic relationship - Roger's "unconditional, positive regard" that every client deserves and every therapist, whatever their proclivity, should be able to deliver to each and every client. If you can't provide this, then no change can take place. How can we respond positively to someone we suspect despises or, at the very least, isn't in tune with our view of the world? Of course we can't. To make changes we have to feel respected, heard and valued.

So, every client is a new learning process. Every client is unique and deserves a completely unique approach, tailored specifically to his or her needs. That's what I sincerely try my very best to deliver.

Just back from a wonderful trip to the US. I was really not looking forward to going, although it would be hard to define why. Long flights, trip on to Seattle, time changes, plane changes - I was feeling I had been a bit over ambitious. But what a worthwhile experience. My daughter in Carolina looks wonderful. It was so lovely to see her happy and full of life. Of course, it's not all plain sailing - bringing up two boys on your own is not an easy option, but she has good friends and good support and is really doing well and has found her own sense of style and self worth. We are all looking forward to seeing her again at Christmas.
My trip to Seattle was also lovely. It's some years since I was there and, despite the weather, I had forgotten what a beautiful city it is. Two solid days of catching up with my best friend was so rewarding, alongside meeting her smashing children and eating good food - not always possible in the US, I find. Visting old haunts, including the wonderful Pike Place Market with its fabulous fruit and veg., not to mention the famous fish trower! Despite a few flight glitches - I wish a fellow passenger hadn't told us they were sticking the wing up with duck tape!! - it was an exceptionally rewarding trip.

The Practitioner Peer Support Day yesterday went very well. Quality not quantity was the order of the day when seven hypnotherapists met to exchange ideas, learn about "regressing to cause" and instant inductions, celebrate their successes and accept suggestions on how to deal with clients who are complex or "stuck". Despite a lower number of participants than I had anticipated, the day was very enjoyable and very informative. I am planning a third PPSD on Sunday, 27th January 2008 and once again anyone interested in attending can contact me at jose@mindtochange.co.uk. This cost is £25 per person.

Once again a long time has elapsed since my last posting. I had intended to review some interesting case studies in this blog but have been so busy with clients I've had no time to write about them!

I have seen some exceptionally interesting clients this year, making my work very rewarding. In the summer I had to change my supervisor as my friend of some 10 years retired. I am looking forward to working with my new supervisor, a man this time.

I have established a peer support group for hypnotherists, under the auspices of the General Hypnotherapy Register. The group meets every 4 to 6 weeks and is going well. It is usually attended by about 6 local therapists of varying disciplines, although all are trained in hypnotherapy.

This coming, Sunday, 30th September, I am covening a Practitioner Peer Support Day for the south east area of the country in Woking. I have attended some very interesting days put on by Dominic Beirne in Warwickshire and decided something similar in the south east area would be welcome. Anyone interested in attending either this or subsequent Practitioner Support days, please contact me at jose@mindtochange.co.uk. The next will be later on in January 2008. The days run from 10.30 am to 4 pm. Refreshments are provided throughout the day and there are many places to lunch nearby.

A couple of weeks ago I received my first ever complaint from a client. I was surprised how hurt I felt, particularly as I had worked really hard to help this woman. As is so often the case, the presenting issue was not really the root of the problem. The experience brought, of course, new learning. It reminded me that therapy of any kind is not magic. However skilled the therapist, the client must come with an open mind, a willingness to change and be prepared to work with the therapist to facilitate that change.

I have just found a brilliant website, http://kenwarren.com.au, recommended by the General Hypnotherapy Standards Council - www.general-hypnotherapy-register.com. Ken Warren's site is full of interesting and helpful information for therapists setting up in practice and has given me new inspiration and determination to succeed! Havng leafleted a whole estate about losing weight and stopping smoking earlier this month, I was feeling quite despondent at the lack of response. Looking at Ken's material I'm all fired up and full of ideas again! Rome wasn't built in a day, as they say.

Off to put new efforts into getting myself out there. And if you want to lose weight, stop smoking, feel more relaxed or say good bye to depression, then visit my website, www.mindtochange.co.uk or, better still, give me a call.

Well here we are at the start of a new year and everyone will have promised themselves they will lose weight, stop smoking and do the one hundred other things they promise themselves they’ll do every year – and a month later will all be out the window!! Unless, of course, they have sought the help and support of a hypnotherapist! www.mindtochange.co.uk

The 2007 Health Bill will completely ban smoking in most public spaces and workplaces and includes outlawing the provision of smoking areas at work. There will be very limited exceptions to the ban, notably private homes, residential care homes, hotel rooms, prisons and hospitals. Employers may provide an outdoor area for smokers but there is no legal obligation on them to do so.

This smoke-free legislation is being introduced because tobacco smoke is now recognised to be the single greatest preventable risk to health. It causes 30% or all cancer deaths, 84% of lung cancer deaths, 17% of deaths from heart disease and 80% of deaths from bronchitis and emphysema. Smoking is responsible for more than 100,000 deaths in Britain each year.

Smoking can also seriously affect business productivity. A smoker may take up to 6 ten minute breaks per day, resulting in the loss of one hour a day or 5 hours in a week. Non smokers may resent the fact that smokers are taking more breaks and begin to take more or longer breaks themselves, thus damaging both productivity and staff morale in a company. Staff who are exposed to smoke, whether they be smokers or non smokers, are likely to be ill more often and may also take longer to recover.

However, the introduction of this anti smoking legislation may be just the incentive some people need to encourage them to give up smoking and hypnotherapy can help.

The majority of smokers start smoking when they are young and before long it becomes an addictive habit. As with any habit, it is difficult to break through willpower alone because it becomes an integral part of who you are. You rely on cigarettes in certain situations or associate them with certain friends or activities. Once this habit is established, it is no longer within conscious control. Non smokers don’t crave or even think about cigarettes because they just are not in their mind set.

Hypnotherapy is designed to take away the desire to smoke. Instead of feeling they are giving up something they enjoy, people feel they are getting rid of something they don’t want – a much more positive idea.

Hypnotherapy has a high success rate with smoking cessation and stopping smoking is one of the most common reasons why people consult a hypnotherapist. Clients are encouraged not to dwell on the negative aspects of smoking, but to aim for positive outcomes such as fitness, freedom, energy and good health!

So, if you want to help yourself, friends or family to stop smoking or, indeed, to stick to other New Year’s resolutions this time round, then contact me by email: jose@mindtochange.co.uk

Well, this was an interesting day. I've achieved a lot and had some great new ideas about marketing all of my own. Two promising client sessions as well. My "to do"list is reducing and I'm feeling up beat and positive. My core Process words, Embracing Freedom, seem to be opening up new opportunities for me all the time.
I am wondering what's the best use I could make of this blog? Maybe some hints and tips for coping with every day life would be a good start. I shall think on....
Meanwhile, you might like to follow the link:

www.mindtochange.co.uk

Well, that last entry was optimistic! Here we are at 21st November and this is the first whole day I have spent on my new venture! So much for my vision of rising early and going to my office, fired with enthusiasm to start work on my long "to do" list!
Still, the time hasn't been wasted. I've achieved lots of practical, household tasks and also been to visit dear Sas, who's doing well in her new single mum role. Such a relaxing trip, enjoying the beautiful fall colours and getting reacquainted with the grandchildren across the pond. Great to see them so much more relaxed and happy - even the dogs have picked up on the new calm atmosphere!
Now to matters of work - clients are flowing in steadily and I have had two really excellent successes this week, one client with a fear of heights whose session went particularly well. The second a client on his third session of treatment for anxiety and panic attacks who is feeling much calmer and has begun to make some important changes in his life. It is so good to see people responding and finding a new way forward.
Since learning my Core Process - Embracing Freedom (see www.flameinstitute.com) I have found a new confidence in myself and my abilities as a therapist. I have always believed that, with the right approach and support, everyone can reach their own potential and so now I am using my core process to enable others to embrace freedom too.
Now it's back to the "to do" list to knock off a few more tasks before lunch!

Well, only 7 days to go to 'R' day when I shall finally be free to prioritise my own time and welcome many new clients to my therapy practice. And at last I'll be able to fully realise my Core Process, Embracing Freedom! Exciting times. I can't remember a time in my adult life when I was free to organise my life just as I wished. Always the constraints and demands of work and children. I know there will still be commitments and deadlines and discipline if I am to succeed - but they will, I hope be under my control - no longer dancing to the tune of others.
Watch this space.

Well, they say you shouldn't go back and we certainly should not have gone back to the Blue Lake. The last time we were there (which we now realise was about 16 years ago – how time flies when you're having fun) the evening sun shone warmly down on us as we sipped our aperos on the terrace overlooking the lake. As we ate an exquisite meal, the sun was replaced by a full moon. We were served wine by a charming young man training to be a sommelier, who was mortified when the cork broke in half as he withdrew it from the bottle. Ah, what a wonderful evening. No wonder we were tempted to return and relive this idyllic scene. We envisaged reclining in the sun beside the lake and even took our swimming cosies ready for a refreshing dip.

Alas, in the interim so much had changed. We sploshed down the long drive through deep puddles as the rain poured down. Our little Sprite, now 40 years old and not used to being out in wet weather, leaked through every orifice. Water in the foot wells lapped over our feet as we struggled out and dashed with our bags across the waterlogged terrace, occasionally slapped around the head by dripping trees. We were shown to our room, where the sound of a constant stream of water escaping from a hole in the guttering on the nearby outhouse drowned out the sound of the pouring rain. Never mind, we were looking forward to a wonderful meal. Had we but known!

Dinner was served at 7.30 and there was no way a drop of drink or meagre crust would pass our lips before that time. We could see the proprietor, clad in his apron, petting the three resident dogs in the kitchen, as he began preparing the meal. The proprietress moved at a pace slower than that of a snail, except when she spent a happy ten minutes ignoring all the other diners whilst she chatted animatedly to some old friends already seated. Eventually she brought the menu and an aperitif, accompanied by some very old and stale cocktail biscuits and peanuts of the same era.

Eagerly we opened the menu, only to find that it was not only very expensive by French standards but seemed to consist entirely of duck in every form imaginable – and some which are not! Roast duck, smoked duck, fois gras of duck, ducks' gizzards – what ever can be done to a duck, they'd done it! (We immediately resolved to eat elsewhere the following evening.) We struggled through our disappointing duck in semi darkness as they were clearly economising on lighting and rain continued to pour down outside. Breakfast was also served in darkness – obviously lighting was not permitted between the hours of dawn and dusk!

This paragraph should, of course, open with the words: “The following day dawned bright and clear.” Sadly it did not – the rain continued to rain non stop. Fortunately it takes a lot more than rain and duck to dampen our spirits but next time we're tempted to revisit romantic old haunts, someone please remind us to resist the temptation and try somewhere new!